Wednesday, October 1, 2008

Sparty: Behind the Dress




We all know our beloved Herky is the best mascot there is. When we travel to play a game or welcome a team to Iowa City, we need not only to study the opposing team, but the opposing mascot as well. On our little post today, we will examine what is going though Sparty's head in each of these pictures-much to the David Letterman routine. The picture to the left is self explanatory. For those who are not familiar with the Cedar Rapids (flooded) establishment of the Happy Hour Health Spa-Google it.




Picture #1 Did Sparty:
A) Drop the kid?
B) Threaten to eat the kid? or
c) Claim to be the kid's father?










Picture #2 Sparty is:
A) Couples skating?
B) Trying to look under her skirt? or
C) Getting it on with the best MSU sororities have to offer?







Picture #3 Sparty is:
A) Throwing a party?
B) In the Middle East? or
C) Mistaking the Breslin Center for Chrysler Arena?








Picture #4 Herky eventually puts Sparty's flag:
A) Out on Melrose Ave?
B) At The Field House?
C) In the Iowa River?










Picture #5 Sparty is:
A) Break dancing?
B) Getting a cheap laugh?
C) Trying to get Herky's size 25 shoe out of his hind parts?




If you head to East Lansing this weekend, please stay away from this extra terrestrial being. There's nothing more Michigan than a manly mascot with a dress. I know Sparty has Greek roots but I am not sure what about East Lansing, Michigan says Greek". If you do get close to Sparty, have some fun with him. Put a sign on his back, kick him around, or accidentally spill your beer on him. If you mess with him, take pictures and submit to us (globalhawkeyenation@gmail.com). We'll be happy to post.

Tune in tomorrow for Anti-Michigan University Day.

5 comments:

NoVAHawkeye said...

What's the difference between Michigan State and cereal?
Cereal is always in a bowl!

Top Ten Courses at MSU

10. Philosophy: Why Don't They Spell It with an "F"?

9. Prelaw Seminar: Age of Consent in 50 States

8. Sandwich Making: A Project Course

7. Hand-Shadow Workshop

6. Subtraction: Addition's Tricky Friend

5. Cliff's Notes vs. Monarch Notes: 2 Views of the Classics

4. Hydraulic Principles of the Keg

3. The College Classroom: A Simulation

2. ABC's: An Extended Version

1. Your Ass from a Hole in the Ground: A Comparative Study


A guy walks into a bar ...

and says, "Hey barkeep, did you ever hear the one about the Michigan State Spartans?" Four huge men stand up and approach the man. One of them says, "We play football at MSU, you wanna tell that joke to us?" The guy replies, "What? And have to explain it four times?"


What do you get when you drive slowly thru East Lansing?
A degree from MSU.

How do you keep a Spartan out of your yard?
Put up a goal post!

Anonymous said...

SpartyMSU Says... How do you Spell Looser... ?? I-O-W-A..

MSU wins 47 - 13...

Greene is shut down, Jake and/or Ricky (Who ever is QB..) won't be able to get a pass off...

http://blog.spartymsu.com/2008/07/29/2008-spartan-football-predictions-iowa.aspx

http://blog.spartymsu.com/2008/09/30/2008-game-6-msu-vs-iowa.aspx

Both reviews has IOWA loosing..

Good Luck Saturday.. Since the Hawkeye schedule only gets worse... At Indy.. Ill.. Wisky.. JoePA..

Atleast join SpartyMSU for a Beer Bong this weekend..

Anonymous said...

I'm just wondering if all the Iowa coaches have their resume's updated and ready to go. After Saturday, it's only gonna get worse.

NoVAHawkeye said...

Opie - Did you learn to spell at MSU? "Looser"? Come on, at least do a spell check before you try to insult us!

Unknown said...

Iowa is a good educational school and has a decent sports program but being ranked 5 spots ahead of MSU academically does not make you Harvard. By the way U of M is ranked 40 spots ahead of Iowa.